Loving Like Water

I feel like I am fighting a battle and it is tiring. 
Old Me and Now Me are like children constantly having a go at one another, running rampant as they try to beat the other one down into submission for control of my mind.  I am getting tired of climbing over the mess these fights leave behind because it is like a step back for every two forward as I try to maneuver the chaos that follows in their wake. 
Old Me is terrified and anxious and jealous and miserable.  Now Me is trying to get past all of that.  Old Me is used to running the show.  Now Me knows a better way.  Old Me writes blogs like the one from yesterday.  Now Me sometimes loses the fights, the end result being blogs like yesterday. 
Ultimately, I think Now Me wants to find detachment.  Of course the wanting of it is already the incorrect path.  Want is desire and desire leads to suffering.  But how does one simply become detached? 
I recall a time in my life when I was, in a way.  I was much lighter, then.  I could float on a breeze and find the sun wherever it was shining.  I feel heavier now.  I am weighed down and unhappy.  I am weighed down by these things I hold on to.  My struggle is in letting them go.  I feel that, like a helium balloon at a children's party, I would be able to float to freedom if I could break the ribbon attached to the balloon filled with sand. 
It is all about living in the moment.  Feeling what is there, not what was or what might be.  That is hard for me.  I am trying, though.  I read an analogy today likening detachment to water.  Life is not about staying away from everything.  It is more like placing your hand in water.  For the time that your hand is there, it is surrounded and taken in completely by the water.  When you remove your hand, the water lets it go, but for the time it was immersed, it was fully there.  Like the water, we should embrace what we have when we have it, but know that it won't be there forever and to let it go when it is time.  We should love like the water.

As a completely unrelated side note, I had a tremendous feeling of deja vu right at that moment.

I find a lot of ideas that I like are centered on water.  Water is cleansing and renewing.  Water helps us grow.  "This is water". 

I am going to try this detachment thing in this way.  My gut tells me that it is a good thing and I have recently discovered that my gut is fairly spot on. 

Namaste